Last night when we went to bed Ella had already been in bed about three hours. I quietly tiptoed into her bedroom and bent down to her crib. I stood there crouching for a few minutes watching kind of in awe, my sweet baby sleep. Her face looked just like an angel. I listened to her breathe. My heart felt like it was just flooding with love. I love so much about my life, but the love I have for Ella is unlike any other kind of love. Looking at her I sometimes still am in awe that she's mine. She's here and she's mine. It sometimes overwhelms me. I almost wanted to cry watching her sleep, I felt so overwhelmed. I had to go get Dave so he could experience this as well.
At almost eight months, we've never really crept into her room while she sleeps. We peek in constantly, but have always stayed at the doorway. Perhaps it's because it used to be so hard to get Ella to sleep at night. We used to tiptoe around like little mice on our way to bed, so careful not to wake her. Things are different now. As I stood there watching her, I couldn't resist. I stretched out my hand and stroked the top of her head. She stirred and brought her hands to her face and sighed audibly at my touch before relaxing her arms back down at her sides. I love this little thing so much. Being a mom is so much more than I imagined. It's a lot harder and a lot more exhausting, but also much more wonderful than I ever thought it would or could be. Being Ella's mommy is the absolute greatest gift. I'm so thankful. God has really blessed us.
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